Both.

In case you need a friendly reminder, Midlifer.

It’s okay to take a deep breath, and it’s just as okay to zero in on that thing that consumes your focus. You can do both.

It’s okay to grieve what needs to be grieved, and it’s absolutely fine to celebrate that which deserves to be celebrated. You can do both.

It’s okay to pause when pause is appropriate, and it’s alright to push through some things, too. You can do both.

It’s okay to be uncertain, and it’s just as acceptable to be hopeful amidst uncertainty. You can be both.

It’s okay to be bold, and it’s good to be prudent, too.You can be both.

It’s okay to feel confused, and it’s spot on to be clear. You can be both.

It’s okay to struggle, and it’s good to experience peace. You can feel both.

It’s okay to feel defeated, and it’s wonderful to feel victorious! You can feel both!

It’s okay to feel beat down, and it’s okay to feel inspired. You. Can. Feel. Both.

The drudgery of another mundane chore but the beauty of a new day before you.

The frustration of unresolved tensions but the eternal gratitude of the relationships they represent.

The stress of competing priorities but the joy of having family, work, friends and community in which to engage.

Friends, I don’t have official degrees in human behavior, but I’m a certified Midlifer, and there should be a diploma for that.

Because I’m here to tell you we’re all these things and often more, all at once.

Sure, there are moments when we are more one thing than the other, and for some of us, there are times of crisis when we are blank with survival.

But most of the time and for most of us midlifers, we are wildflowers, scraggly humans with beautiful blooms and weedy people with some colorful petals.

I just wanted to remind you that you might actually be growing if you’re scraggly but also beautiful and weedy but also undeniably pretty.

You are supposed to be both, Midlifers.